its the convo season..yet the happiness brings me a lot more tears..
i just hope that once he reads this, he realizes that its the day
after i asked him to consider our relationship..this blog is his...
until now i dont really know quite right whether im allowed to post
as many entry here..screw that! this is just a medium for me to get
in touch with his numb heart. i am currently reconsidering....lately
the relationship gets tougher than i thought its supposed to..im too
embarrassed to tell a real story, thats why ive improvised..its not my fault
when the other him contacted me.. he has always been supportive, showing
how much the past didnt matter at all.. but him?he cant let go of the past..
i did, but he didnt..i know that ive done wrong..if only he could treat
me a lil better, this thing wont happen...hes always putting the blame on
me..and im getting fed up of that... i dont feel loved anymore..hes just very
busy not talking to me..instead of talking to me, really look at me when im beside
him, he talked to someone else..i have no problem confessing that i love him in
front of many people..in fact, ive done that..but him?he is just as numb as he used to.
even though i said im reconsidering, but deep down in my heart i still love him..
i wanted to be with him, now and in the future..i thot he knew..but i now i dont think
he do..his brain is as numb as his heart..froze to keep everything inside..letting no
one to enter including me...i have no access to his heart,but he has to mine..i just
needed him to speak up..so that i would understand..i hope i would..at least ill try..








lost gemil